


In the Bathroom at a Party

by FBGM



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Crossover, Getting Together, Jared and Michael being memes, Jealous Jeremy Heere, Kleinsen, M/M, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, boyf riends - Freeform, dumb oblivious idiots, no squip au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-11
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-06-26 07:01:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 13,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19762999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FBGM/pseuds/FBGM
Summary: When someone comes into the bathroom having a panic attack while Michael is hiding out in there, a new friendship is born. But will making new friends fill the Jeremy sized hole in his life?





	1. Michael

**Author's Note:**

> Basically, bmc is the same except there's no squip it's just a strange Rich and Jeremy friendship that made Jeremy popular. And for deh, Connor never killed himself. (in other words: I remove the defining plot points for two musicals and then shove their characters together! Enjoy!)

“Come on Jeremy!” Michael threw his hands up. “You know you’ve started acting different since you started hanging around with Rich.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Jeremy rolled his eyes. Michael felt his anger flare up. He seethed, clenching his jaw before he exploded.

“You’ve been acting like a dick!” He yelled. Jeremy’s head snapped up. “Ever since Rich decided he liked you and introduced you to all the popular kids you’ve been a grade-A asshole Jeremy. Don’t try to deny it.” He snapped before Jeremy could defend himself. “You treat me like I don’t exist and ignore me all the time! You never come over anymore. You’re ending up just like them!”

“So what?” Jeremy screamed. “Maybe being like them isn’t the great sin you think it is! I mean why can’t you just be happy for me? I’ve been waiting for this my whole life! It’s _fun_ to have friends! God, Michael sometimes I’m tired of it always being just us!”

“What’s wrong with just us?” Michael asked, ignoring the stinging behind his eyes.

Jeremy didn’t reply.

“So you wanted more friends.” Michael said, louder now. “I get it whatever. But you didn’t have to ditch me!”

“Oh please!” Jeremy scoffed. “Like you wouldn’t have jumped at the chance to be popular no matter the cost!”

“I wouldn’t have.” Michael said, quieter this time.

“Yes you would!” Jeremy shook his head. “You’re just jealous.”

“Jealous?” Michael was incredulous.

“Yes. Jealous.” Jeremy clenched his fists at his sides. “You’re jealous that Rich picked me. You’re jealous that you got stuck here being a geek by yourself. Don’t act like you wouldn’t have done the _exact_ same thing to me if you had the chance.”

“That’s a joke, right?” Michael raised his eyebrows.

Jeremy stepped toward the door but Michael blocked his path.

“No. Are you actually messing with me Jeremy?” He glared. “Tell me that’s a _fucking_ joke.”

Jeremy just sighed. “Get out of my way.”

“Or you’ll _what_?” Michael asked with a cold laugh.

Jeremy looked up, eyes hard. “Get out of my way. Loser.” He shoved his way past Michael.

The door slammed shut.

Michael stood very still for a while. Hoping that maybe if he didn’t move, the moment would stay frozen too. That Jeremy would still be there.

Michael let out a breath. He looked at himself in the mirror and was surprised to find that he was already crying. He hadn’t even noticed it. But now, looking at himself, he felt pathetic. The waves of horrible sadness crashed into him full force and he began to sob. He clutched the edge of the sink with white knuckles. His whole body shook as he cried.

Eventually, he pulled himself away from the sink, stumbling back a few steps until his legs bumped the bathtub. He sat down, feeling the cool tile on the backs of his thighs. Slowly, he let himself slide backwards until he was seated fully in the tub, knees pulled up to his chest. He was struggling to breathe normally. He tried to remember how many seconds you were supposed to inhale and exhale but his mind didn’t seem to be able to focus on anything but crying and gasping and shaking. He dug his nails into his shins, leaving little crescent shapes in his skin.

He was okay. Alright, he definitely _wasn’t_ okay. But he would be. He just needed to calm down. And once he got his breathing under control and stopped crying, he could leave. He could go home and play some video games and get high and not think about Jeremy. As soon as his face was dry. Or maybe he should just make a break for it and if anyone asked, he could just blame the red eyes on weed. He knew no one would ask. He would be surprised if a single person at this party even knew his name. This thought made him cry harder. Jeremy had been right about one thing. It had always been just them. And now, it was just Michael, alone, in the bathroom at a party.


	2. Evan

“Jared please?” Evan said for the millionth time.

“Evan come on it’s our senior year.” Jared groaned. “We have to go to _one_ party. And then we can spend the rest of the year watching movies about trees or whatever. Okay?”

“Okay.” Evan mumbled. He knew it wasn’t as easy as that. He knew Jared would still drag him to things he didn’t want to go to. But the thing was, he also _would_ stay home with Evan and watch dumb movies sometimes. And in all honesty, sometimes Evan was glad that Jared dragged him out of the house. Both because it proved that Jared actually wanted him around and because without Jared, he’d sit at home all the time and as much as he relished in the safety of staying home, sometimes he felt like he was missing out on important life experiences.

So, grumpy as he might be, he followed Jared up the driveway and into the loud, crowded house. His anxiety spiked the second they stepped inside. Jared glanced at him and grabbed his wrist, guiding him over to a less crowded area.

“Just an hour or two.” Jared called over the booming music. Evan nodded.

Despite his sarcasm and sometimes mean-spirited humor, Jared was great at making friends. He was funny and friendly. Evan was only just recently learning this himself.

After his explosion at Jared over the summer about what an asshole he was all the time, things had changed. They got into a huge week-long fight. But then, shocking the entire world, Jared _apologized_. He apologized for treating Evan so badly and said he wanted to try again, to be a real friend. And so, they began picking up the pieces of their friendship. Jared had learned to think about things before just blurting them out. He had pushed Evan to speak up when things upset him and Evan had pushed Jared to well… be a better friend. They both adjusted. And as a result, and surprising both boys, they had actually become very close friends, best friends, some might even say. Of course, the _some_ would never say this when Jared was around. Jared still liked to loudly insist that they were only family friends, but it didn’t bother Evan anymore. Not when Jared always answered his skype calls, and begged Evan to go to parties with him, and slept over every other weekend.

So Jared was a good friend and he was good at making friends. Which is what he was currently doing. Or, he had been the last time Evan saw him. But now there was the slight problem that Evan didn’t see him at all. Everything felt so much more suffocating without Jared by his side. The music was louder. There were definitely more people. The rooms were smaller. He wasn’t sure he could survive the hour.

He considered just going outside to wait by Jared’s car but he didn’t have the keys. Plus, what if someone saw him loitering out there and thought he was trying to steal it and called the cops? He felt his breath start to quicken. He needed to get out. He stumbled down the hallway until he saw a door with a paper sign reading “bathroom” on it. He threw the door open and locked it behind him.

“You having a panic attack too?”

Evan jumped a foot in the air at the sound of the voice. He whipped around to find a boy sitting in the bathtub. His eyes were red and puffy and his voice was raw. He was hugging his knees to his chest and looked not unlike what Evan knew _he_ looked after panic attacks.

Evan nodded.

The boy scooted over to one side of the tub and patted the spot next to him.

“Come. Panic with me.”

And Evan wasn’t sure why the idea didn’t freak him out. But he found himself climbing into the tub and sitting down anyway.

The boy next to him was breathing deeply and, Evan suspected, a little louder than normal. Evan wasn’t positive, but he had a feeling that he was doing this for Evan’s benefit. And lo and behold, it worked. Evan matched his breathing to the boy’s and soon he wasn’t wheezing and gasping for air anymore.

“You okay?” The boy finally asked.

“Yeah.” Evan wiped his face. “I just- sometimes I get- I have anxiety so parties aren’t… great.”

“Oh.” The boy nodded. “No offense, but why did you come to a party if you knew it would make you have a panic attack?”

“I um- well I came with my friend- well he’s sort of my friend- we’re like family friends but anyway,” Evan stammered. “He um sorta just you know, disappeared on me and I don’t really- I don’t know where he is… now.”

“Shit.” The boy shifted slightly. “I can help you find him if you want. So you don’t have to look for him alone.”

“Yeah.” Evan nodded. “Thanks. That would be good.”

The boy climbed out of the tub and waited for Evan to do the same.

Evan tugged on the bottom of his shirt, an old habit.

“Do you think we could wait a little bit longer though?”

“Sure.” The boy nodded. He sat on the edge of the tub, humming along to the muffled music outside.

“So um,” Evan drew the boy’s attention back to him. “What happened to you? I mean- I just meant, why were you, you know… in here?”

The relaxed expression faded as he cleared his throat. “Oh uh, well my best friend started hanging out with these popular kids and totally ditched me. I tried to confront him about it and he just called me jealous and a loser so…” He lowered his voice, Evan heard it shake anyway. “I guess we’re not really friends anymore.”

“Shit.” Evan mumbled. “You lost your best friend and here I am crying about physically losing mine.”

The boy looked at him for a minute and then he started laughing hard. Evan frowned but all the sudden he couldn’t help laughing too. It was odd to sit there, in a stranger’s bathtub, laughing with some boy he just met after having a panic attack. But if felt good.

“Come on.” The boy held his hands out and pulled Evan out of the tub. “Let’s go find your friend.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, bathrooms at parties are great places to meet friends


	3. Michael

The boy was still shaking as they stood in front of the bathroom door.

“Would it help if you like, held my hand or something?” Michael asked. He wasn’t exactly trained in how to help with anxiety but he figured he’d offer.

The boy nodded. “Yeah actually. That would be better. If you don’t mind.”

“No it’s cool.” Michael grabbed his hand, gave it a reassuring squeeze, and pulled the door open.

The barrier of the door gone, the party seemed overwhelming now. Michael felt bad when he felt the boy tense up beside him.

He tugged him gently through the crowds, never letting go of his hand. They wound their way around the house until Michael was pulled to a stop.

“That’s him.” The boy pointed. The wormed their way over to a short boy in a red button up that was unbuttoned to reveal a t-shirt underneath. “Jared!”

“Evan!” The kid closed the distance between them. Michael did not miss the way Jared’s eyes lingered on he and Evan’s still intertwined fingers. “Where the hell have you been?”

Evan started mumbling and looked very nervous so Michael stepped forward.

“I found him having a panic attack in the bathroom.”

“Oh fuck.” Jared grabbed Evan’s shoulder. “I’m really sorry man.”

Evan shook his head. “No it’s fine. Um,” He turned to Michael expectantly.

“Michael.” He offered.

“Michael,” Evan repeated. “Helped me out.”

“Right.” Jared said, eyes flicking down to their hands again. “Well, thanks Michael.” He turned back to Evan. “Come on, you’ve been tortured here enough. Let’s go get food?”

Evan nodded and finally released Michael’s hand.

“Thanks for… everything.” He said.

“No problem.” Michael smiled. “I’m glad you found your friend.”

Michael was now realizing that he had managed to distract himself for a while but now he would, in fact, have to go home and process everything that happened and would most likely start crying again.

He turned to go but Evan called after him.

“Wait! Michael?”

“Yeah?”

“Um, never mind actually. It’s probably stupid. I’m sorry.”

Jared sighed loudly. “He’s trying to ask if you want to go get food with us.”

“Oh.” Michael glanced between them. “I don’t wanna intrude or any-”

“Come on.” Jared cut him off. “My car’s out front.”

And because his alternative was crying alone in his basement, Michael went.

They arrived at one of the few 24-hour fast food places in the city and claimed a booth in the back.

“So,” Evan said, because it was awkward Michael assumed.

“So how do you guys know Jake?” Michael asked.

“Who?” Jared asked through a mouthful of French fries.

“Jake. The guy whose party we were at?” Michael raised an eyebrow.

“Oh. School.” Jared said shortly.

“We don’t know him really.” Evan jumped in. Michael could tell he was desperately trying to stop them from falling back into silence. “But he’s friends with this kid Rich who has math with Jared and Jared sits by him and so they talk every once in a while, and he um, he invited us. Well, he invited Jared.”

“He invited both of us.” Jared corrected.

“He doesn’t know who I am.” Evan rolled his eyes. Jared bumped his shoulder but didn’t respond. Evan retaliated by stealing a fry off of Jared’s plate.

Michael watched this back and forth with an amused smile. He thought he might have an inkling of why Jared was so cold to him.

“So we all go to school together then.” Michael said, watching Jared’s smile return to a tight line when he remembered that Michael was there.

“Yeah I guess so.” Evan nodded. “Weird I don’t think I’ve ever seen you.”

“Me either.” Jared added.

“I haven’t seen you guys either. But I see Rich all the time.” The mention of Rich made Michael’s stomach lurch and suddenly he wasn’t very hungry anymore. He pushed his tray away from himself.

“I’m gonna pee.” Evan stood up. He looked nervously between Michael and Jared for a minute before turning and walking down the hall.

Michael decided this was his only chance to get Jared to soften.

“You can stop glaring at me you know.” He said casually, earning a glare from Jared. “I’m not interested in Evan.”

“What?” Jared choked on his drink. “Why would I care if you were-”

“Come on dude.” Michael rolled his eyes. “I can tell you’re into him.”

“I am _not_ into him!” Jared squeaked.

“Yeah whatever you wanna tell yourself.” Michael waved him off. “Just know I’m not interested. I have my own anxiety ridden mess to pine over.”

That caught Jared’s attention. “Oh? Where is she?”

“He.” Michael corrected.

“Oh.”

“Yeah. Solidarity, right?” He reached over, offering a closed hand. Jared eyed him for a minute before begrudgingly fist bumping him. Michael laughed. “But don’t get any ideas just because we both like dudes. I _am_ still hopelessly hung up.”

“Haha.” Jared said without a trace of humor in his voice. “So where is _he_ then?”

“That,” Michael said as Evan returned to the table. “Is a long story.”

Despite his denial about liking Evan, Jared was considerably nicer to Michael after their little chat. By the time they were making their way back to the car, the three of them were laughing and joking like old friends. Michael was pleasantly surprised that this night had turned itself around so radically.

“Hey.” Jared said as they pulled up to Jake’s house so Michael could pick up his car. “Gimme your number. So we can hang out again.”

Michael grinned. “Sure.”

The three of them exchanged numbers and then Evan and Jared said their goodbyes to Michael and drove off.

Michael still laid awake for a long time thinking about Jeremy. But it didn't hurt as much as he thought it would.


	4. Michael

Michael was surprised when he woke up to texts asking him to hang out the next morning. Jared informed him that he and Evan were going to have a movie day and he was welcome to join them. And then he sent Michael a text in a private thread (ie: not in the group chat he had created and named “meme team”) and begged him to come because Evan had a fascination with documentaries and now that they finally had a third friend Jared needed help outvoting him.

Michael smiled. He texted back that he’d love to come and Jared responded with an address.

He pulled up to the house an hour later. It was small but nice looking. When he knocked it took a few minutes for someone to answer the door. Jared grinned as he gestured Michael inside.

“Michael, my man.” He led him into the living room. The boys had very clearly had a sleepover the night before. There were pillows and blankets strewn across the couches.

“Sorry.” Evan was gathering them and piling them onto one end of the couch. “I didn’t know Jared invited you so early. I was gonna clean more.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Michael shrugged. “It’s way cleaner than my basement.”

Evan shot him a quizzical look.

“It’s like, a furnished basement. I spend most of my time down there.” He explained.

“Cool.” Jared was already sprawled out on one of the couches. Michael sat on the other. “You’ll have to show us sometime.”

“Sure.” Michael nodded. He watched Jared’s the corners of Jared’s mouth tug up slightly when Evan sat on his couch instead of Michael’s. “I pretty much only play video games or get stoned in there though so it’s a mess.”

That caught both the boys’ attentions.

“Get stoned?” Evan raised his eyebrows. “Like… drugs?”

Michael laughed. “I mean it’s just weed but yeah.” He glanced between them. “I’m guessing you guys don’t smoke?”

“I have.” Jared said. “Just, very rarely. Evan definitely hasn’t.”

Evan kicked him but didn’t argue.

“Well,” Michael shrugged, settling into the couch. “If you’re ever interested let me know.” He turned his attention to the TV. “What are we watching?”

It was fun hanging out with Evan and Jared. It wasn’t the same as with Jeremy, of course it wasn’t. But they were funny and interesting and Evan found Michael’s extensive knowledge of the 80s fascinating.

“So it’s the same as regular Pepsi?” Evan asked.

“No!” Michael shook his head. “Weren’t you listening? It’s clear!”

“But the taste is just… Pepsi.” Evan glanced at Jared. Michael could see them struggling not to laugh. And surprisingly, he felt himself trying not to either.

“Yes.” He relented. The three of them dissolved into giggles. Michael wasn’t even really sure why it was funny. But it felt good to be laughing with people. To be happy and social. He’d been spending so much time alone since Jeremy and Rich became friends that he almost forgot what it felt like.

“Shit.” Michael glanced at his phone. “I should get home. But hey, I’ll catch you guys at school, right?”

“Yep!” Jared waved.

“Oh hey!” Evan called. “Since your friend… um, do you wanna sit with us at lunch?”

Michael couldn’t stop the smile from taking over his face. “Yeah that would be awesome.”

“Sick.” Jared said, not looking up from his phone. “Then we can finish our heated debate over whether pac man is the most classic game or not.”

“It definitely is. See you guys tomorrow!”

Michael felt light as air as he drove home. Better than he’d felt in weeks. In months maybe.


	5. Jeremy

Michael had new friends.

The thought hit him like a punch to the stomach. It made sense of course. Michael was a great guy. He was smart and charismatic and kind and funny. And he was _allowed_ to make new friends, of course. Why wouldn’t he be? Especially after Jeremy made his opinion on their friendship very clear over the weekend.

Still, Jeremy had never even seen these people before. And now all the sudden, there Michael was sitting with them at lunch. Laughing and talking like he’d known them for years. And he looked so _happy_ , leaning on them and waving his arms as he told a story.

Jeremy watched them from the hallway. They were sitting outside, under a huge oak tree. There was a tall blonde boy in a polo shirt. A shorter boy wearing a T-shirt with an old video game logo on it (Jeremy was sure Michael had gotten that huge grin on his face when he saw it). And a pretty girl who was surrounded by at least five notebooks and somehow looked to be studying and participating in the conversation at the same time.

Jeremy watched as Michael said something. The whole group laughed and the short boy shoved him. Michael looked pleased.

Jeremy was happy for him. Sure, he had said some… unkind things to him at Jake’s party. But he didn’t _hate_ Michael by any means. He still wanted him to be happy. He didn’t want him to just sulk all by himself and be totally alone all the time. Of course not. That would’ve killed Jeremy. Deep down, Michael was still his best friend. Even if his text thread had fallen to the bottom of Jeremy’s messages. He wanted Michael to be happy. And by the looks of it, he was. He was very happy and probably did not miss Jeremy in the slightest.

And Jeremy was happy for him.

“Hey tall ass let’s go!” Rich called as he held the cafeteria door open.

He was happy for Michael. He didn’t miss him. He didn’t ache to be out there with him right now, laughing at whatever he said. Didn’t long for the days lying on Michael’s bed talking about nothing. Didn’t miss the feeling of Michael’s shoulder pressed up against his while they played video games. Of course not.

“Yo!” Rich grabbed his shoulder. “Come on dude they’re waiting.”

And he definitely was not regretting his choice to stick with Rich.


	6. Michael

“So this is basically my second bedroom.” Michael led his new friends down the stairs to his basement. It was nearly three weeks after Jake’s party and Michael had spent nearly all his time with the two boys. Not that they seemed to mind, they kept inviting him anyway.

“This is so cool.” Evan glanced around.

“Dude!” Jared fell to his knees by the stack of video games on the floor. “You have all of the Apocalypse of the Damned games?” He looked up with wide eyes. He reminded Michael of a little kid.

“Yeah. They were me and Jeremy’s favorites.” He said without thinking.

“Who’s Jeremy?” Jared asked, flipping through more games.

Michael felt a stab in his chest. “Oh he’s um, he _was_ my best friend.”

Evan glanced at him. “The one who…”

“Yeah.” Michael dropped onto the couch. Evan sat softly next to him.

“Who what?” Jared’s attention was on him now.

“Oh uh-”

“You don’t have to talk about it.” Evan jumped in. “Jared can be pushy.”

“Hey!”

“No.” Michael said quickly. “It’s okay. If you guys want to know, I think it’ll be good to talk about it.” He stood up and made his way over to the drawers in the corner. He jammed his hand into the far back of one of them. “But I need a little help.” He pulled out his weed stash and made his way back to the couch. “As long as you guys don’t mind.”

“Go for it.” Jared shrugged. Evan nodded.

“Okay so, Jeremy and I have been best friends since we were five. We were inseparable you know? We did everything together, hung out every day, we practically lived at each other’s houses over summer. I mean,” He focused intensely on rolling his joint with his slightly shaking fingers. “He was the best. He was always there for me. We didn’t really have…” He paused, lighting the joint and taking a long drag. “A lot of other friends. In fact, by middle school we were kind of each other’s only friends.” He watched the smoke float up in front of his face. “But that was fine. We were happy just being a duo.”

He offered the joint to Jared who took it. He inhaled. He didn’t cough but Michael could tell he was holding it back. He held it out to Michael who then offered it to Evan.

“What do I do?” Evan asked, taking it from him.

“Just breathe in.” Michael laughed.

Evan inhaled. He coughed violently. Michael took the joint from him so he wouldn’t drop it and set the couch on fire. He rubbed Evan’s back and passed him a water bottle.

Once Evan caught his breath, they all started laughing. Michael took another hit.

“So what happened?” Jared asked.

“Well,” Michael was feeling the high roll over him a little. “It changed once we got to high school. All the sudden Jeremy wasn’t okay with it being just us anymore. He wanted more friends. He wanted to be cool. Which is fine!” Michael assured, he took a long drag before he continued. “But then um, this year he had a class with Rich. The one you have math with. And I guess they got paired up for a project and sort of… hit it off.” He passed the joint to Jared again. “And then they just became friends out of no where and Rich invited Jeremy to have lunch with him and stuff. Which is fine.” He said again.

He paused waiting as Evan coughed again, a little less this time.

“Wait, so are you talking about that kid that follows Rich around like a lost puppy like _all_ the time?” Jared frowned.

“That’s the one.” Michael nodded, blowing smoke up into the air above him. “So anyway, I start noticing he’s dodging my calls and won’t even look at me at school anymore. And he says it’s nothing and we’re still friends even though we haven’t hung out in like two months. And then at Jake’s party… I tried to confront him about everything. But he just said… he said he’d been waiting for this his whole life and he knew I’d have ditched him too. Which is just…” He paused taking a shaky breath. “Ridiculous. I wouldn’t ever.”

“Jesus.” Jared shook his head. “He sounds like a dick.”

“Yeah.” Evan nodded, placing a hand on Michael’s back.

Michael shrugged. “I don’t know. Anyway, it doesn’t matter because I’ve got new friends now, right?” He bumped Jared’s shoulder.

“Nah we’re only in it for the weed.” Jared teased.

Michael laughed and he felt the tension and the heavy sadness lift away. He wasn’t going to act like he didn’t miss Jeremy. Like he didn’t think about him a lot. Like he didn’t feel like a piece of him was missing. But with Jared and Evan, he didn’t have to be sad about it _all_ the time.


	7. Jared

It was nearing the end of Thanksgiving break, meaning it was the last day of Thanksgiving break, and Jared was bored. His parents had left somewhere. Evan was busy so he couldn’t hang out with him. He picked up his phone and scrolled to his second most used contact.

“Hey what’s up?” Michael’s voice crackled through the phone speaker.

“You wanna come over?” Jared asked. “My parents are gone and I’m bored.”

“Sure.” There was some shuffling. “Should I stop and pick up Evan?”

“No he’s busy with his mom today. They do these monthly family time things.”

“Aw cute.” Michael laughed. “Yeah I’ll be there in 15.”

“Kay. I’ll text you the address.”

Michael looked around as Jared led him through the house a short while later.

“Wow your house is nice.” He commented.

“Eh, I guess.” Jared shrugged.

Michael had never been to Jared’s before. They went to Evan’s sometimes and Michael’s mostly. But Jared didn’t like hosting so much. His bedroom was fairly small which was fine for just him and Evan, but got a little crowded now that there were three of them. Besides, Michael’s basement had a big TV and a couch and no one would bother them down there. It was the ideal hang out spot and Michael (and his moms) always seemed happy to have them over.

They went upstairs and settled on Jared’s bed. Jared began flipping through channels on his TV.

“So,” Michael laid back and put his hands behind his head. “When are you gonna make a move on Evan?”

Jared choked. “I- What? Never!”

“Why not?” Michael grinned.

“I don’t even-”

“Dude you totally do. Get over yourself.”

Jared opened his mouth to protest again but something in Michael’s face made it clear it would be useless. “Look,” He sighed. “Our moms have been friends since before we were born. I am not allowed to have any non-hetero feelings for him.”

“So?” Michael sat up. “Jeremy’s been my best friend since we were five and I’m still plenty gay for him!”

“Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Wait. _Jeremy_ is the guy you like?” Jared raised his eyebrows.

“Uh, yeah?” Michael frowned. “I thought that was pretty obvious.”

“No?” Jared stared at him. “Jeremy sounds like a dick why do you like him? Also,” He continued before Michael could argue. “You said the guy you liked was a quote ‘anxiety ridden mess’.”

“He is! Or, he used to be.” Michael’s shoulders sagged. “I don’t know. But that’s not the point!” He looked at Jared again. “He’s into you too. Just make a move.”

“He’s not. _Trust_ me.”

“He is!”

“Look you don’t know what our relationship was like before, okay? He’ll never see me that way.”

“Are you referring to how you used to like straight up bully him all the time?” Michael asked.

Jared narrowed his eyes. “What the fuck?”

“I’m friends with Evan too you know.” Michael rolled his eyes. “He told me. After I told you guys the whole Jeremy story.”

“Damn Evan.” Jared shook his head.

“He forgives you.” Michael said softly.

“I know.” Jared muttered. “But it’s still there. It still happened. He’ll never see me that way.”

Michael looked like he wanted to say something else but he just shrugged and took the remote from Jared.

As much as he enjoyed (and of course, slightly preferred) Evan’s company, Jared found he had really taken a liking to Michael. They shared a lot of interests that Evan didn’t care for. Plus, he was always rambling about some obscure ancient thing that Jared had never heard of but found interesting nonetheless. But even when it wasn’t just the two of them, Michael fit into their little group perfectly. He was feisty enough to keep up with Jared, kind enough to make Evan feel comfortable, and even patient enough to be pleasant to Alana, no matter how many times she interrupted him.

And although Michael had never said it out loud, Jared thought he was pretty happy with his new group of friends. And though _Jared_ never _would_ say it out loud, he was starting to feel the same protectiveness over Michael that he felt with Evan. Which meant that, despite never actually speaking to him, Jared very quickly came to despise Jeremy Heere.


	8. Jeremy

Jeremy missed Michael. Worse, he hated his own new friends. In actuality, they weren’t all that bad. But Jeremy had nothing in common with them. They just wanted to drink and party and talk about drinking and partying and god Jeremy missed Michael _so much_.

He spent countless nights on his bed, finger hovering over Michael’s contact. Never having the guts to press the call button. He didn’t know how he could even begin to apologize. Plus, he knew there was a chance that even if he did apologize, Michael would have no interest in being friends again. And Jeremy wasn’t sure he could take that.

So, he pushed it down and ignored it. Well, he tried to anyway. He ate lunch at a table full of people and still managed to feel lonely. He stared at Michael all throughout English. He wrote and deleted dozens of texts.

But he never actually planned on talking to Michael. Really. He didn’t. But one day after school he saw Michael and his new friends walking to the parking lot. They were laughing and joking around and before he even realized it, Jeremy was changing direction and walking toward them.

He ached to see Michael up close. To see him and hear his voice and make him laugh. God, he missed hearing Michael laugh.

“Michael!” He called.

Michael stopped for a minute before he turned around and faced Jeremy. His two friends stood behind him. The taller one whispered something to the shorter one. Jeremy could feel their eyes burning holes in him but he kept his eyes on Michael. He could see the tension in his shoulders.

“Hey.” Jeremy said when they were finally standing in front of each other.

“Do you want something?” Michael asked. “Cause if you’re just here to tell me I’m a loser, save your breath. I already know.”

Okay, that hurt. But Jeremy knew he deserved it.

“I want-” He frowned at the ground, collecting his thoughts. “I want to apologize. I was a huge dick and I hurt you. And that was shitty. And I’m so sorry. I…” He took a breath and forced himself to look at Michael’s stern expression. “I miss you so much Michael. I hate not talking to you.”

“Yeah? Funny. Didn’t hate it for the past two months.” Michael snapped.

“I did! I just… didn’t know how to apologize. I’m sorry. I really want my player two back.” He saw the corner of Michael’s mouth twitch up.

“Try again.” He said.

Jeremy sighed. “I want my player _one_ back.”

Now Michael smiled. “Alright fine. But you owe me slushies for life.” He stepped toward Jeremy.

“Deal.” Jeremy grinned.

“Screw that!” The boy with the retro looking t-shirts stepped forward.

“Jared don’t!” The other boy squeaked. But Jared did.

He stomped up to Jeremy and looked him straight in the eye.

“You think you can ditch him for months and then toss him a lousy ‘I’m sorry’ and everything will be fine?” The boy, Jared, shoved a finger into Jeremy’s chest. “That’s bullshit.”

“Jared.” Michael sighed but he was smiling as he pulled Jared back. “It’s really fine.”

“No it’s not!” Jared yelled. Jeremy’s heart twisted. Why was this kid so invested in protecting Michael’s feelings?

“It’s okay.” Michael sighed.

“No it’s not.” Jeremy said suddenly. “He’s right. You deserve more than that. But um,” He glanced at the other two boys. “Could we maybe talk just us?”

“Yeah.” Michael nodded.

“Come on Jared.” The taller boy stepped forward and took Jared by the wrist. “We can get a ride from Alana.”

Jared huffed but allowed the other boy to lead him away.

The drive to Michael’s house was awkward. Jeremy didn’t want to apologize in the car. And since he hadn’t fully apologized yet, neither of them felt comfortable enough to joke around.

Jeremy felt a sense of home wash over him as he entered Michael’s basement. He hadn’t been there in months. It was exactly the same. The TV, the messy stack of games on the floor, the couch, the dresser where Michael stashed his weed. It was like it was frozen in time, exactly the same as it was when Jeremy had left it however many months ago. Except, a gray jacket was tossed across the couch. One that Jeremy, who could list pretty much every article of clothing Michael owned, didn’t recognize.

“Sorry.” Michael picked the jacket up and set it on the coffee table. “Jared left that here yesterday.”

Jeremy felt a tug at his heart. He knew Michael had new friends so it made perfect sense that they would’ve come over at some point. But he couldn’t help the sick feeling in his stomach at the thought of Michael and Jared down here, in what had always been he and Michael’s space. He wondered what they talked about. Obviously, Michael had told them about him.

“Alright so… go.” Michael prompted and Jeremy realized he was still standing.

He sat on the couch beside Michael and tried to remember all the things he had been planning to say on the ride over.

“So, I know I already said it but, well honestly, I don’t think I can say it enough at this point. I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have ditched you. Not just because popular kids suck and you’re way more fun.” Michael snorted at that. “But also because you’ve always been there for me. You’ve been the best friend in the world for 12 years and I treated you like garbage. I shouldn’t have left you. You didn’t deserve that.” He clenched his fists to stop his hands from shaking. “I’ve spent the past, what, three months? However long since Jake’s party just… miserable. Because you were my best friend, you _are_ my best friend, and I hurt you and pushed you away and I couldn’t take it back not matter how badly I wanted to.”

Michael was smiling slightly. “Go on.”

“Having a bunch of friends wasn’t worth it, you were right. It’s about quality not quantity. And you’re the highest quality friend out there. So, if you can forgive me, I’d really like us to be friends again.”

“ _Best_ friends?”

“Best friends.” Jeremy nodded.

Michael grinned and tackled Jeremy in a hug. “I missed you too.” He said. “Even though you were a huge dick. I missed you.”

Jeremy buried his face in Michael’s hoodie and pretended he wasn’t crying. Michael, graciously, also pretended once they separated.

“Hey.” He nudged Jeremy. “Come meet my friends tonight.”

Jeremy nodded. “I’d love that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy apologizing is my kink


	9. Evan

Evan liked Jeremy. It was nice to know he wasn’t the only one who irrationally freaked out about things. Evan thought it was funny, the parallels between them. He thought Michael was sort of like Jeremy’s Jared. Although, Michael hadn’t bullied Jeremy for years but that was beside the point. Jared was better now. Evan forgave him because he saw that Jared was trying. He knew Jared cared about him.

And as strange as it was, Evan suddenly had a group of friends. Suddenly, even if Jared _was_ being annoying, he had other people to talk to instead. It was good. He could tell his mom was happy too. He was getting out of the house more, spending time with other people, he even invited the three of them over to his house for a sleep over.

“Hey.” Jared strolled in without waiting for Evan to answer the door. Evan didn’t mind, it meant he wouldn’t have to get up from the couch. “I can’t sleep over. My aunt’s having this stupid party tomorrow and we’re leaving early I guess.” He rolled his eyes as he flopped next to the other three boys.

“It’s cool.” Evan flipped through the channels on TV.

“Hey Jared.” Michael slid across the couch. “Did you see that thing I retweeted earlier?”

They fell into conversation. Evan noticed that Jeremy was staring at them very attentively. He thought he knew why. Even though Jeremy had known Michael longer, he was still new to this little group they had formed. Jared had finally stopped being hostile to him when Michael promised Jeremy had fully and thoroughly apologized. But still, Evan thought that sometimes, Jeremy felt left out.

“Hey Jeremy,” Evan leaned back into his line of sight. “Michael said you had some ideas of what we could watch tonight?”

“Oh,” Jeremy frowned, drawn out of his thoughts. “Yeah.” He scooted closer to Evan as they began to talk about their movie options. Evan smiled. It wasn’t often that he got to be the one making someone else feel included.

Eventually, Jared said goodbye. Michael removed his feet from Jared’s lap and Jeremy stopped pouting.

“See you bitches later.” Jared waved as he slipped out the front door.

Michael swung around and deposited his legs into Jeremy’s lap instead. Jeremy didn’t seem to mind this.

“Soooo, Ev.” Michael started.

“Yes?”

“Anything you’d like to share with us?”

“About?” Evan raised an eyebrow.

Michael shrugged. “Anything. Life. School. _Boys_.”

Evan felt his face heat up. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Jeremy looked confused.

Evan tried to tell Michael to shut his mouth with his eyes, but Michael either didn’t notice or chose to ignore him.

“Jeremy!” Evan said suddenly. “Will you do me a favor and grab me a water from the fridge?”

Jeremy looked between them for a second before shrugging and walking out of the room.

“Yes, obviously I like him!” Evan hissed. Michael grinned. “But could you maybe _not_ tell everyone?”

“It’s not everyone.” Michael rolled his eyes. “It’s just Jer. You can trust him.”

He said this very softly and all of the sudden a few things clicked in Evan’s mind. Jeremy came back in. Evan shot Michael a look and he rolled his eyes but nodded.

“So,” Jeremy handed Evan the water. “What are we watching next?”

After a while they turned the TV off and stretched out on the two couches and one air mattress. They laughed about stupid things and whispered even though Evan’s mom wasn’t home. Evan didn’t think he’d ever felt so comfortable and happy around anyone who wasn’t Jared.

“Guys.” Evan said suddenly. It had been quiet for a while and he didn’t know if the other boys were still awake.

“Yeah?” Michael’s voice came through the darkness.

“Jeremy?”

“Hmm?”

Evan sat up and crossed his legs. “I like Jared.”

“What?” There was a shuffling sound which Evan suspected was Michael sitting up. The lamp beside him clicked on. “Seriously?”

“Yes?” Evan frowned. “I thought that’s who you were talking about earlier.”

“I was talking about _Connor_.” Michael said, he looked confused but he was smiling.

“Connor? Murphy?”

“Yeah! I saw you guys talking in the computer lab the other day!”

“So?” Evan stared at him. “That was our first and only interaction.”

“I didn’t know that.” Michael shrugged.

“Wait.” Evan frowned. “If you weren’t talking about Jared, why did you wait till he left to ask?”

Michael’s eyes widened slightly. “I don’t know. I didn’t. I just didn’t remember to ask earlier.”

Evan had a sneaky feeling that Michael wasn’t telling him everything.

“Well, no. It’s not Connor. It’s Jared.”

Michael had a strange look on his face. It was something between pleased and mischievous.

“Are you gonna tell him?” Jeremy asked, shifting so he could see Evan better.

“No way.”

Michael sighed very loudly. “Why not?”

“Because he doesn’t like me. I mean, he’s probably not even gay. And even if he was, he’d never like _me_. I don’t want to embarrass myself.”

“I get that.” Jeremy mumbled, his eyes ever so subtly drifting toward Michael.

Evan looked at him for a long time. He debated whether he should voice his suspicions to Jeremy one day when it was just the two of them.

“Ev, I’m sure everything would be fine. Even if he didn’t feel the same.” Michael assured him.

Evan shook his head and laid back down. “No. No way. I’m not telling him.”

“Okay.” Michael sighed. “It’s your choice.”

“Thanks for telling us though.” Jeremy said. “I’m glad you trusted us.”

He said ‘us’, but Evan knew he meant ‘me’. As they fell into silence and slowly drifted off to sleep, Evan decided he really liked Jeremy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case it wasn't clear, Michael waited till Jared left because he didn't want Jared to be upset if Evan said he did like Connor. Also thank you guys for all the sweet comments they make me so happy :)


	10. Jeremy

Jeremy and Michael had never gone out this much when it was just the two of them. But now, Jared seemed to always be dragging them to some event or another. And Michael was always thrilled by his ideas.

A lot of things Jared did excited Michael. And, despite that he knew it was totally unreasonable, it made Jeremy slightly resent Jared.

The first time the four of them hung out in Michael’s basement together Jeremy had been so filled with some strange concoction of anger and sadness that he almost puked.

Michael and Jared had raced each other down to the bean bags ( _Jeremy and Michael’s_ bean bags) and Michael immediately passed him a controller. They started playing Mario Kart. They were yelling and elbowing each other and laughing. Jeremy couldn’t stop watching. Michael smiled so wide every time he looked at Jared. It tore Jeremy’s heart into tiny pieces and sprinkled them into his stomach.

Evan touched his arm lightly. Jeremy tore his eyes away from the other boys to look at him.

“You any good?”

“Huh?”

“At Mario Kart.” Evan nodded to the screen.

“Jeremy’s insane!” Michael called. “He can beat anyone. Except me.” He added with a smirk in Jeremy’s direction. This resulted in him crashing and allowed Jared to speed past him and claim first place just before the end of the race. Michael cursed and punched his arm.

“Please, I could beat you in my sleep.” Jeremy rolled his eyes.

“Oh really?” Michael took the controller from Jared and ushered him out of the bean bag. “Let’s see it then.”

“Fine. I’ll kick your ass on the first try.”

“Bring it, player two.” Michael smirked. Jeremy’s heart somersaulted and all the air was sucked out of his lungs. He shook his head and turned his focus to the screen.

Michael won. And proceeded to rub it in for the rest of the day. But Jeremy didn’t care. Because as long as he was teasing Jeremy he wasn’t flirting with Jared.

But now they were playing laser tag. And while Jeremy had _thought_ that he and Michael being a team would be a good thing, Michael instead spent the whole time meticulously hunting Jared down. Jeremy slumped behind one of the walls. Jared flew past him, shooting his gun wildly and making Jeremy’s chest piece buzz. He didn’t bother getting up to go revive himself.

“Hey.” Evan appeared in front of him.

“Don’t bother.” Jeremy held his hands up. “I’m already dead.”

Evan laughed. “Me too. Mind if I sit?”

Jeremy nodded and Evan slid down beside him.

“We’re pretty screwed huh?” He said quietly.

“Well we can’t both lose so one of us isn’t.”

Evan laughed. “I didn’t mean the game!”

“Oh.” Jeremy frowned. “Then what _did_ you mean?”

“Jared and Michael.”

Jeremy just stared, still not processing.

Evan sighed. “They’re obviously into each other, right?”

“Oh.” Jeremy said. “Um, I don’t know.”

“Come on.” Evan glanced back at the sound of laughter. “They are.” He stared at his hands. “And we’re just the idiots who fell for them.”

“What?” Jeremy straightened. “I did _not_ fall for Michael.”

Evan raised an eyebrow. “Come on man.”

Jeremy deflated. “Is it that obvious?”

“Sadly, yes. You know you never stop glaring at Jared?”

Jeremy flushed. “I can’t help it. They just get along so well.” He picked at a lose piece of his shoe. “How do you stand it?”

“Oh trust me I’m dying on the inside.” Evan promised. “But I don’t know, I like Michael a lot. He’s a great friend and if he’ll make Jared happy then…” He trailed off as the laughter got closer.

“Yeah.” Jeremy peered around the corner to where Michael and Jared seemed to be circling each other without actually shooting, spitting fake insults in between bursts of laughter. “I get it.”

Evan bumped his shoulder. Jeremy smiled slightly. Evan was nice.

Suddenly, Michael flew around the corner, skidding to a halt when he saw them.

“Jeremy what the hell!” He grabbed Jeremy and pulled him to his feet. “Why are you fraternizing with the enemy!”

“We were both dead.” Jeremy shrugged. “Where’s Jared?”

“I killed him.” Michael grinned. Then he fake scowled. “I was out there _murdering_ people for you and you’re just here _talking_ to our _enemy_! Ridiculous.”

“Sorry.” Jeremy laughed. He pointed his gun at Evan. “Pew. Pew.”

Evan clutched his chest. “Ag! Noooo! You got me!” He leaned over and fell to the floor.

They emerged later, squinting at the bright sunlight. Michael’s arm was draped around Jeremy’s shoulders as he bragged about how they were the ultimate team. Jeremy didn’t mention the fact that the match had pretty much just been a one on one since he and Evan were dead the entire time and just kept sneaking off to talk.

Jared rolled his eyes and demanded a rematch later with a different partner.

“Oooh. Yeah. What do you think Jer?” Michael wiggled his eyebrows. “You and Jared versus me and Evan?”

“Yeah.” Jeremy glanced over to catch Evan’s eye as Michael and Jared argued about who was a better laser tagger. Evan rolled his eyes. “So fucked.” Jeremy whispered.

He and Evan both laughed despite themselves.

“What’s funny?” Michael asked.

“Just you guys.” Evan shrugged.

Michael and Jared looked equally confused.

Jeremy just shook his head and tugged Michael along. “Come on let’s get to the car it’s hot as hell out here.”


	11. Jared

“I can’t believe I turned you into a stoner.” Michael shook his head as he dug through the drawer.

“I am not a stoner.” Jared snorted. “This is only like the fourth time we’ve smoked together.”

“Weed is a gateway drug.” Michael said seriously as he started rolling.

“You’re an idiot.” Jared rolled his eyes.

They smoked their way through two joints and talked for a while. Jared liked hanging out with the group, but Evan wasn’t a huge fan of being high so Jared and Michael usually did that alone. Or with Jeremy. Jeremy didn’t like when Jared smoked with them, Jared could tell. Probably because he liked Michael. Still, it wasn’t Jared’s fault Jeremy was jealous but also wouldn’t admit his feelings. He did wish one of them would suck it up and just say something already though. Michael always got sappy when he was high. It was annoying.

“I finally get how you could tell I liked Evan.” He said as he watched Michael roll a third joint. “You act the same around Jeremy.”

Michael blushed and ducked his head. “I’m _not_ as bad as you.”

“You definitely are.” Jared laughed. “Maybe worse.”

“I am not!” Michael threw a pillow at him.

They fell into silence again. Then Jared frowned.

“You’re sure he’s good for you?”

“What do you mean?” Michael cocked his head. He put the joint to his lips and lit it.

“I mean, you know after everything he did. He left you. He hurt you really bad.” Okay, so maybe Jared got a little sappy when he was high too. That’s also why he preferred to smoke without Evan around. He didn’t know how Michael could control himself and not say something gay to Jeremy every time. Practice probably. “How do you know he’s not going to hurt you again?”

“I don’t.” Michel shrugged. “I mean, I can’t. But I trust him. I’ve known him for 12 years, I trust him.”

“But he already _did_ hurt you once.”

“I don’t mean I trust that he’ll never hurt me.” Michael explained, shaking his head. “I mean, I trust that even if he does- _when_ he does, he’ll always come back. He’ll apologize and he’ll mean it. He’ll fix things. Like he’s doing now. He’s trying, I can see it. Jeremy isn’t perfect. But he loves me, I know he does. Maybe not…” He paused, taking a hit. “Maybe not in the way I want him to. But he does love me. And he’ll never do anything that can’t be fixed. I trust him that way.”

“Hmm.” Jared mulled that over. He supposed it made sense. Maybe that’s why Evan had given him another chance. Not because he knew Jared wouldn’t mess up again. But because now he knew that when he did, he’d make it up to Evan.

Jared was pulled out of his thoughts by Michael humming something under his breath. He frowned as he listened.

“Is that… are you humming the wii song?”

“Yes.” Michael held a very straight face for a few seconds before collapsing into laughter. Jared joined him, gripping his sides.

They stopped suddenly at the sound of a buzzing. Michael’s phone.

“Hellooooo?” Michael sang. Jared realized then that Michael was a little farther gone than he was. He’d smoked a lot of the second joint by himself and hadn’t yet got around to passing the third to Jared. “Jeremy! What’s up?” he grinned.

There was a muffled voice on the other end. Jared took a hit while he waited.

“Saturday? I think so. Did you have something in mind?”

More muffled replies.

Michael’s grin slid into a smirk. “Well, I know _something_ we could do.”

Jared lunged forward and grabbed the phone out of Michael’s hands. As much as he wanted them to confess, what he _didn’t_ want was for his friend to completely embarrass himself.

“Jeremy hey.” He said into the phone.

“Hi, uh Jared?”

“Yeah sorry, Michael’s like super high right now.”

“Oh.” Jeremy’s voice sounded small. “Yeah that makes sense. He always gets… like that when he’s high.”

Jared raised his eyebrows. Did Michael always flirt with Jeremy when he was high? And Jeremy never picked up on it? Or maybe, he thought he acted like that around everyone, including Jared. Which Jared could confirm was absolutely not true.

“Anyway,” Jeremy said. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you guys.”

“No! It’s no bother. Michael was happy to talk to you.” Jared rushed out. “I just wanted to make sure it wasn’t something important that Michael’s high brain wasn’t prepared to deal with.”

“Oh. No. Nothing important. Be safe. See you later.” Jeremy hung up.

Jared cursed himself. Michael would’ve thought it was important. It didn’t matter what it was, it was important because it was Jeremy. But now Jeremy thought Michael didn’t want to talk to him because he was too busy flirting with Jared. Great. Way to help out your friends, Jared.

“What did he say?” Michael asked.

“Um, nothing. He just said to be safe.”

Michael snorted. “How would we be unsafe all we’re doing is sitting down? How much could we fuck up from sitting here?”

_Apparently, a lot,_ Jared thought.


	12. Jeremy

Saturday was supposed to just be for them. For Jeremy and Michael. But no, Michael had gotten excited and suggested they bring Jared and Evan along too. So now all four of them were crammed into the cruiser, headed to the beach.

Jeremy was in the front seat, of course, he had rights as the best friend. He should’ve felt warm and happy when Michael said this but he couldn’t stop thinking about how Michael and Jared had duetted some song Jeremy had never heard before as soon as the drive began. They were good together, Jeremy thought. And as much as it hurt him to think, he agreed with Evan. Michael deserved to be happy. So, if being with Jared was what made Michael happy, who was he to get in the way? Especially after the shit he pulled.

So, when they pulled into the gas station, Jeremy got out of the car and pulled Jared’s door open.

“Get out.” He said a little more aggressively than he intended. Just because he was doing the right thing didn’t mean he was happy about it.

“Why?” Jared squinted up at him.

“I wanna ride in the back.” Jeremy shrugged. “I wanna talk to Evan. And I can’t do that across you and Michael scream singing every other song.”

Jared looked at him for a minute. He frowned and then a sort of realization dawned on his face. “Oh my god.” He said, shaking his head.

“What?”

“Just-” He glanced at Michael. “Nothing. Whatever.” He got out and waved Jeremy into his seat.

Jeremy slid into the back and Evan gave him a sad smile.

“Yeah. Yeah.” Jeremy muttered. “So fucked.”

The rest of the ride was miserable. Jeremy tried to convince himself he was doing the right thing but it was hard when he was so annoyed by every interaction between the two boys in the front seat. It didn’t help his moral dilemma when he noticed Evan watching them with the same distaste.

“Huh Jeremy?” Jared said suddenly, yanking Jeremy out of his wallowing.

“Huh? Sorry I wasn’t listening.”

“I said,” Jared rolled his eyes. “You’ll have to help us convince Evan to go swimming.”

Jeremy felt a surge of anger for no reason. “I don’t like swimming.”

“You love swimming.” Michael snarked in the rearview mirror.

“Well, whatever.” He huffed. “If Evan doesn’t want to, he doesn’t have to.”

“Thanks Jeremy.” Evan laughed.

“No come on Ev!” Jared twisted around in his seat to look at Evan. “Come swim. Pleeeeaaase?”

Jeremy watched Evan’s resolve melt and he felt hot anger burn through him. That wasn’t fair. Jared wasn’t allowed to have both of them. Evan was supposed to be his back up, his support! Jared couldn’t take him _and_ Michael.

“I guess I could go for a little.” Evan mumbled.

Jeremy clenched his fists.

“Awesome!” Jared twisted farther around to see Jeremy as they pulled into a parking spot. “So is it you we’ll have to drag out there?”

Jeremy shoved his door open and stepped out. He slammed it shut instead of answering Jared. Michael met him by the trunk.

“Hey are you okay?” He asked as Jeremy started grabbing towels. He sounded annoyed. Jeremy bristled.

“Fine.”

“Jeremy.” Michael grabbed his shoulders. “I know you’re lying. So whatever it is, either talk to me or figure it out. And stop being a dick to Jared.” He turned back to the trunk and gabbed the cooler.

Jeremy blinked a few times to stop himself from crying.

“Evan!” He called. Evan appeared at his side. “Help me carry these?” He passed half the towels to Evan and stomped toward the sand. Evan followed.

“What’s wrong?”

“I thought it would be good to let them… whatever.” Jeremy kicked the sand as he walked. “But it just sucks.”

Evan nodded. “Yeah, funny thing is… I don’t really think they like each other.”

“Huh?” Jeremy stopped walking.

Evan shrugged. “I don’t know. After you switched seats Michael seemed kinda disappointed. I’ve just been noticing lately that maybe we- you know jumped to conclusions. Makes sense doesn’t it?” He laughed a little. “Being who we are.”

Jeremy turned back to Michael and Jared. They weren’t laughing or racing each other down the beach. They were just walking. Neither of them were even talking.

“I don’t know.” Jeremy turned and started walking again.

“I don’t either.” Evan admitted. “Maybe they do like each other, maybe they don’t. But I don’t want either of us to lose our best friends because we’re trying to give them space to be together or whatever you know?” He bumped Jeremy’s shoulder. “I had fun sitting with you. But I was also having fun sitting with Jared.”

Jeremy stopped again. “Oh fuck. Evan I’m so sorry I didn’t even think…”

Evan shook his head. “Don’t worry. It was still nice with you.”

The other boys had caught up to them by now.

“Hurry up slow pokes!” Jared called as he marched past them.

Jeremy caught up and tugged Michael back. Evan shot him a smile and hurried to catch up with Jared.

“I’m sorry.” He said as they walked.

“Why are you sorry?” Michael frowned.

“I don’t know. For being moody.”

“ _Are_ you okay?” His voice was a lot softer this time. “I didn’t mean to sound like an ass earlier.”

“No!” Jeremy shook his head. “You didn’t. It’s nothing really. I just… it’s nothing. I’m okay.”

Michael turned to look at him as they finally reached the spot where Jared and Evan had begun setting up. He didn’t say anything but he squeezed Jeremy’s shoulder before moving around him to set down the cooler.

“Jeremy?” Jared called. He was halfway to the waves. “You comin in?”

Jeremy took a deep breath and pulled off his shirt. “Yeah I’m coming.”

He raced down the beach, briefly letting go of all the feelings swirling in his brain and just enjoyed being at the beach, surrounded by friends.


	13. Jeremy

They swam until the cold water had totally numbed them and then decided they should probably eat. The four boys traipsed up the sandy beach and collapsed in a heap on their towels.

“I’m so hungry.” Michael groaned. He was laying on his back with his legs on top of Jeremy’s and an arm over his eyes.

“Same.” Evan, the only one willing to move, opened the ice chest and started digging around for food.

They eventually ended up in a circle, eating and talking.

“Wait so you tried out for a play to impress a girl, _got the part_ , and then just, never showed up for rehearsal?” Jared struggled to get the words out because of how hard he was laughing.

“Yes.” Jeremy sighed. “And now I can never go near the theater ever again.”

“That’s-” Jared wheezed. “That’s ridiculous.”

“It’s totally understandable.” Evan smacked him.

“Thank you!” Jeremy high fived him.

He looked over to Michael who hadn’t said anything for a while and was surprised when he was met with Michael’s eyes staring back at him.

“What are you looking at?” Jeremy kicked him softly.

Michael blinked and shook his head. “You’re face is sunburnt. It’s pink.”

Jeremy touched his face and then shrugged. “Oh well.”

“I have to pee.” Jared announced, standing up. “Jeremy, join me?”

“While you pee?” Jeremy wrinkled his nose. “No thanks.”

Jared narrowed his eyes. “Jeremy. Come with me.”

Jeremy stood up because honestly, he was a little scared of what would happen if he didn’t.

They walked across the sand in silence for a while. Jeremy figured Jared was probably waiting for an apology.

“Um,” He started eloquently. “I’m sorry about earlier. For being so snappy.”

“Oh, are you?” Jared laughed but he didn’t sound angry.

Jeremy still took it offensively and crossed his arms. Jared glanced at him and rolled his eyes.

“Jesus, now I know how Michael felt.” He said.

“Huh?”

“Look,” Jared swung around to face him. They had reached the concrete slab where the bathrooms were. “When I first met Michael, I thought he liked…” Jared paused. “The guy I liked. So I was an ass to him until he told me he didn’t like the guy I liked. So now it’s my turn.” He grabbed Jeremy’s shoulders and shook him softly. “I’m not interested in Michael.” Then he turned and walked into the bathroom.

Jeremy followed him, sputtering. “I don’t- why would I _care_ if you were interested in Michael?”

“Holy shit this is the same conversation.” Jared laughed. “Anyway you’re really bad at hiding your feelings so I know you’re into him. So just chill. I’m not trying to steal your man.”

“He’s _not_ -”

“Yeah. Yeah. Whatever.” Jared waved him off. “Are we cool?”

Jeremy stared at him. “Yeah. We’re cool.”

“Okay. Now I actually do have to pee.”

Jeremy took the hint and waited outside.

Jared emerged a few minutes later and they started the walk back to their friends.

“He likes you too by the way.” Jared said casually.

Jeremy tripped over nothing and almost fell face first into the sand. “WHAT?”

“Yeah.” Jared said once he finished laughing. “The first day I met him he said he didn’t like the guy I liked because he was still hung up on his own anxiety ridden mess.” He pointed at Jeremy. “And that was you.”

Jeremy walked in stunned silence for a while. They had almost reached the towels where Evan and Michael were sitting.

“So I’d make a move or something.” Jared whispered as they finally came to the towels.

Michael eyed them. “Everything okay?”

“Yep!” Jared plopped down. “We’re besties now.”

Michael raised his eyebrows and looked to Jeremy for confirmation.

“Yep.” Jeremy nodded. “Peas in a pod or whatever.”

Michael laughed. “Don’t be replacing me now.”

“You?” Jeremy put a hand over his heart. “Never.”

Michael laughed.

Jared caught Jeremy’s eye and wiggled his eyebrows. Jeremy quickly dropped his gaze to his lap.

_Make a move. Make a move, it isn’t that hard really. Just, tell him you like him. Ask him out. Hell, just kiss him. I mean, we’re at the beach at sunset for god’s sake. It shouldn’t be this difficult to admit your feelings for someone._

“Jer?” Michael waved his hand in front of Jeremy’s face. “You still with us?”

“Huh? Yeah.” Jeremy shook his head. They had given up on swimming an hour ago because it got too cold. So now they were all sitting, towels wrapped around their shoulders like blankets, watching the sun sink behind the horizon.

 _Okay,_ Jeremy thought. _Just do it. Ready? Go._

He turned but Michael was already deep in conversation with Jared.

“NO!” Jared yelled, he was waving his arms and Michael was stifling laughter. “They couldn’t kill them that way. That’s not how it works!”

“Why not?” Michael laughed openly now.

“Because, the books _say_ …”

Jeremy groaned and laid back, staring up at the darkening sky. Jared was wrong. And Jeremy couldn’t get in the way of something so perfect.

The ride home was quiet because everyone was half asleep. Michael hummed along softly to the music that was playing. Jeremy tilted his head to study Michael’s face.

“Take a picture it’ll last longer.” Michael said suddenly.

Jeremy rolled his eyes and faced forward again. “Nobody says that in real life.”

“I just did.” Michael reached over and poked his side. Jeremy looked at him again. He could just say it now. It was another perfect moment.

“Oh!” Michael glanced back for a second before refocusing on the road. He sighed. “Dammit. Never mind, Jared’s asleep.”

Or not. Jeremy took that as a sign from the universe. His heart sunk all the way into his stomach. He stared ahead, determined not to look at Michael for the rest of the ride and not to get his hopes up for the rest of… well his life he guessed.


	14. Jared

Michael was a sap. He was a giant mushy romantic. A giant mushy _depressed_ romantic who couldn’t figure out why Jeremy seemed so sad all the time lately. Jared had a very good idea of why Jeremy was moping all the time. But he couldn’t just _say_ it to Michael. He knew he’d be pissed if Michael told Evan _his_ feelings. So he kept his mouth shut.

“I don’t know. I just miss him.”

“You saw him yesterday.” Jared rolled his eyes.

“You know what I mean!” Michael glared. “He’s acting weird. Like, he’s all distant. Like he doesn’t want to be around me.”

“Michael, he’s…” Jared bit his tongue. It wasn’t his place. “He’s probably just dealing with something. I’m sure it’ll pass.”

“Well then why won’t he talk to me about it?” Michael pouted. He fiddled with his hoodie strings. “I mean, I know he doesn’t like me the way I like him but I _am_ still his best friend.”

Jared really wanted to scream. He sighed instead. “I don’t know man. It’s probably nothing. Just give him some time.”

Michael sighed but he nodded.

Jared could keep his mouth shut. Really, he could. But it was becoming increasingly more difficult.

“I mean, did I do something?” Michael was pulling blankets out of the hallway closet. The four boys were having a scary movie marathon since Michael’s moms were gone and they’d be able to scream as loud as they wanted. “Maybe I hurt his feelings or something.”

“Michael, I’m sure it’s not you.” Jared assured even though it was very much Michael. Just, not in the way he thought.

“Then why is he-?” He was cut off by the sound of the doorbell.

_Thank god,_ Jared thought heading toward it.

“I’ll get it.” He called. He swung the door open to see Jeremy and Evan. They all moved to the basement and started setting up.

“Oh shit.” Michael glanced around the room. “Jared, we forgot to go pick up snacks.”

“Oh yeah.” Jared glanced at Jeremy who was very clearly clenching his jaw. No doubt because of the fact that Jared had been here earlier helping set up. “Why don’t you and Evan go get snacks and Jeremy and I will finish setting up?”

Michael frowned slightly, glancing at Jeremy but he nodded and grabbed his keys.

As soon as the front door shut Jared was stalking over to Jeremy. “Okay. Dude just fuckin ask him out already Jesus.”

“I don’t-”

“Do NOT say you don’t like him Jeremy I swear to god.”

“Okay fine!” Jeremy threw his hands up. “Yes I like him! But you guys get along way better. I don’t want to get in the way!”

“First of all we literally don’t. You guys are best friends and you know way more about each other and have way more fun together so shut up. Second, half the time we’re talking _about_ you. And third, holy shit dude I already told you I’m not into him!”

“Yes you are!” Jeremy snapped. “I can tell. You always get all blushy when you’re around him.”

“That’s not because of him!” Jared scoffed.

“Then why?” Jeremy asked, arms crossed, eyebrows raised. There was no tip toeing around it, not if he wanted Jeremy to believe him.

“BECAUSE I LIKE EVAN DUMBASS!” He yelled.

There was a sort of choking sound from the stairs. Evan and Michael were halfway down the steps, both of them wide eyed. Michael’s mouth was hanging open. He closed it quickly.

“I… forgot my wallet.” He explained.

Jared wanted to die. He wanted the floor to open up and swallow him.

“Jared…” Evan started.

“Spare me.” Jared shoved past him. “I know. It’s out of the question.”

He climbed the stairs two at a time and then ran to his car, yanking the door open and driving a little too fast until he screeched to a halt in his own driveway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The truth is revealed dun dun dun


	15. Jeremy

Everything had happened very quickly. Jeremy’s head was spinning. He turned toward Evan who was still standing there, frozen.

“Hey Ev,” Michael cooed. “I know you’re sensitive and all, but your boy just told you he liked you and you just let him leave. I don’t think that’s sending the message you want it to.

Evan blinked. “Jared… right. Okay.” He looked to Michael. “What do I do?”

“Uhh,” Michael laughed. “Go after him?”

“Tell him how you feel?” Jeremy suggested.

“Right. No. Of course.” Evan nodded. “Go after him. Tell him I like him.” He looked back to Michael. “Yeah I can’t do that. I can’t-”

Evan started breathing very rapidly.

“Okay. Okay.” Michael guided him to the couch. He sat Evan down gently and began rubbing his back. Jeremy tentatively sat on Evan’s other side.

“I-” Evan tried, gasping for air.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Michael soothed. “Breathe with me okay?”

He took a long deep breath in and then let it out. He repeated this several times until Evan was breathing along with him. His hands stopped shaking. Jeremy watched all of this feeling very helpless, but Michael seemed to have the situation under control. He continued rubbing circles on Evan’s back.

“You’re okay.” He murmured. “Right?”

Evan nodded. “I’m- I’m good.”

“Okay.” Michael caught his eye. “Let’s talk yeah?”

Evan nodded again.

“You okay with Jeremy staying?”

Evan looked at him. Jeremy gave him what he hoped was a reassuring smile. A smile that said he was okay with whatever answer Evan gave. It was a lot to try and put into a smile.

“Yeah he can stay.” Evan nodded.

“Okay.” Michael said. “So, what do you want with Jared?”

“What?” Evan blinked, clearly surprised at the abruptness of the question.

“What do you want with Jared?” Michael repeated. “You need to know what you want before you go talk to him. It’ll help you figure out what to say and then you won’t get so nervous.” Michael explained.

Jeremy was amazed at how… thoughtful that was. Not that he didn’t think Michael was thoughtful before. But he’d never seen him act so gently.

“So,” Michael continued. “Do you want a relationship? Do you want to just stay friends? Or something else?”

“A relationship.” Evan said immediately. “I mean, obviously you know? I just, I don’t know how to say it. This is so much to process.” He shook his head.

“I understand. And he will too.”

“Oh god.” Evan suddenly groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Oh god I just stared at him. I just stared at him and didn’t say _anything_.”

Michael laughed. “Ev, it’s fine okay? He’s going to forgive you as soon as you tell him you like him too.”

“I know I just… I don’t know if I can do that?”

“Why not?” Jeremy frowned. “You told us.”

“Yeah I know. And I _do_ like him. It’s just, when I actually look at him and think about- you know just, _saying_ it out loud.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “It’s scary. It’s like- like my throat closes up and I can’t breathe.”

“I know how you feel.” Michael mumbled. He put a hand on Evan’s shoulder. “But you can do it. You know he likes you. He’ll be happy.” He stood up and held out his hands. “Come on, let’s go find your boyfriend.”

Something passed between the two of them then. Something Jeremy didn’t quite understand. Evan looked at Michael and then he smiled and took his hand.

“Okay.”

Jeremy and Michael walked him to the door.

“You can do it.” Michael said, hugging him quickly.

“Yeah.” Jeremy called as Evan walked toward his car. “And if words are too hard, just kiss him!”

Michael looked at Jeremy for a minute before shaking his head and closing the door. And then it was just the two of them.


	16. Michael

They returned to the basement couch. There was silence. Michael had heard the rest of the conversation between Jeremy and Jared. But he didn’t want to bring it up. He wasn’t sure how he could misinterpret what Jeremy had said, but he was sure he’d find a way.

“So I guess we have to wait to start the movies.” Michael said, bumping Jeremy’s shoulder with his own.

“Guess so.” Jeremy laughed but his smile quickly slid into a frown.

“You okay?”

“I’m fine.” He tapped his foot. “Did you know about Jared?”

“Yeah.” Michael nodded. “I found out the first day I met him. He’s very obvious.”

Jeremy nodded. “He thought you liked Evan when you guys first started hanging out?”

“Yep.”

“But you didn’t.”

“Nope.” Michael waited, sort of hoping it would click in Jeremy’s brain so they could get this conversation over with. The one he knew was rapidly approaching. They couldn’t avoid it for much longer.

“Do you like Jared?” Jeremy blurted suddenly.

“Um,” Michael laughed a little. That hadn’t been the question he was expecting. “If I did, would I have just sent Evan to go get together with him?”

“I don’t know.” Jeremy shrugged, staring at his hands. “Maybe. Maybe if you knew it would make Jared happy. Maybe if you really liked him and cared about him a lot. And you just wanted him to be happy even if it wasn’t with you because his happiness is the most important thing in the world to-”

He would’ve kept talking, Michael was sure, for hours if Michael hadn’t reached over and taken Jeremy’s own advice. It seemed words were quite difficult at the moment. He pressed his lips to Jeremy’s firmly.

Jeremy didn’t talk when he pulled away. He just stared at Michael.

Michael laughed. “I told Jared from day one that I didn’t like Evan because I was still hung up on my too cool for me best friend.”

“I’m sor-”

“I know. Shut up.” Michael said, and then he pulled Jeremy back in and this time Jeremy was much more prepared and much more enthusiastic.


	17. Evan

Evan paused outside Jared’s front door. He should knock, he knew that. But Jared’s mom’s car was gone, meaning she was still at work. And Evan highly doubted that Jared would answer the door right now. So, he took a deep breath and gave the door a push. It was unlocked. Ah, Jared and his forgetfulness.

He closed (and locked) the door softly behind him and tip toed up the stairs. Jared’s door was open a tiny bit. He nudged it farther with his shoe.

Jared looked up and then sighed.

“God Evan can you just leave me alone?” He was sitting, cross legged on his bed. There was music playing from his phone. Something Evan recognized from the ‘calm down’ playlist Jared kept on his phone for Evan.

“No.” Evan said.

Jared looked surprised and then… he just looked defeated.

“Listen, if you’re just here to tell me you’d never… in a million years, save your breath okay? I know. It’s fine. I’m hardly your friend let alone-”

“You’re my best friend.” Evan interrupted without thinking.

Jared looked up at him with wide eyes. Then he squinted, trying to tell if Evan was joking. He knew better. Evan’s jokes weren’t like that.

“Yeah well… anyway.”

“Anyway.” Evan continued for him. “I didn’t come here to- I just- I wanted to say- I…” And there it was again, the suffocating. He looked at Jared who was calmly, if a little tiredly, waiting for Evan to speak. To explain himself. But Evan couldn’t because well… words were too hard.

He took a slow breath and then climbed onto the bed, placing one leg on either side of Jared. Jared’s face ignited and he looked at Evan with wide eyes.

“I just wanted to…” Evan started again. And then he leaned down and kissed Jared. He didn’t really know what he was doing so he let Jared take the lead, which he did without hesitation.

When they pulled away Jared frowned at him.

“I’m confused. You were upset earlier.”

Evan shook his head, his embarrassment returned so he climbed out of Jared’s lap. Jared made a noise of disapproval.

“I wasn’t upset. I was… processing. It was a lot of information. I didn’t even know you were gay!” Evan cried. “Let alone that you… you know.”

“Okay fair enough.” Jared laughed. “I just thought… you know… I’m an asshole.” He dropped his gaze.

“You _were_ an asshole.” Evan corrected, wishing he had the confidence to tilt Jared’s chin up and make him look at him. “But you’re not anymore. You’re a good friend.”

“Yeah. But I _was_ an asshole.” Jared shook his head.

“Yeah.” Evan agreed. “So you’ll just have to make it up to me.”

That caught Jared’s attention. He lifted his head, one eyebrow raised and the ghost of a smirk on his lips.

“Oh?” He said. “And how would I do that?”

Evan shrugged, inching closer. “I’m sure you’ll come up with something.”

Jared closed the space between them and tugged Evan closer as they kissed. This time when they pulled away, they were both grinning.

“I like you too.” Evan whispered.

“No. Really?” Jared snorted, pecking his lips. “I never would have guessed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's gonna be one more short chapter to close it out! :)


	18. Jeremy

“Jer.” Michael said, leaning away from Jeremy slightly.

“Hmm?” Jeremy asked, not really listening. He was too busy trailing kisses down Michael’s neck because well, he could. They’d spent the better part of an hour like this. Jeremy in Michael’s lap, kissing. And talking. But mostly kissing.

“Do you think we should check on them?” Michael asked.

Jeremy sat up at that, frowning. “Oh yeah. It’s been a while huh?”

“Like an hour. Although,” He smiled. “It _does_ take Evan a while to get to the point sometimes.”

“Mmm.” Jeremy hummed. “Call them?” He asked, resuming his task of kissing every bit of exposed skin he could find.

Before Michael could reach for his phone there was a knock at the door. Michael tipped Jeremy off of him and onto the couch and jogged upstairs to answer it.

Jeremy groaned and lazily made his way after Michael.

Jared and Evan were standing on the porch, fingers intertwined. Michael grinned.

“I guess we all got boyfriends tonight.” He beamed.

“I don’t recall you ever asking me.” Jeremy called from the stairs.

“Yikes.” Jared said and tugged Evan down to the basement. “Even I asked Evan properly. And you _know_ how dysfunctional I am.” He called over his shoulder.

Michael turned to the stairs and kissed Jeremy’s cheek softly. “Is that a no?”

“No.” Jeremy shook his head.

“Then…” He pointed to Jeremy. “Boyfriend.” He didn’t wait for a reply, grabbing Jeremy’s hand and pulling him down the couch where there friends were waiting.

Everything was perfect that night. Even when the movie scared them so bad that they refused to turn off the lights with Michael’s moms gone. Jeremy laid awake for a long time listening to Michael breath. He tilted his head and saw Evan curled up against Jared’s side. He was happy for them. His friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is done!!! Thank you all for the kind comments and for sticking with me through this story!! <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> Follow/talk to me on tumblr @ michaelmellonn


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